Melbourne Cold Water Camp was extreme, extremely horrific...
okay it wasn't that bad, but crickey it was tough.
This Melbourne business is for English Channel swimmers, or if you're Lochie (Catalina) or Colleen (North Channel). It's an opportunity for aspiring channel swimmers to complete their qualifying swim and to generally really really get into the swing of whats to come.
We arrived on thursday and gathered for a briefing on the weekend's activities and to meet the newbies; Michael Christie and Karlie - Welcome.
Then it was straight in for our first 1.5hr swim, followed by a night swim 2 hours later.
Easy Peasy
Next morning we wee'd into cups, had blood taken, weighed and had our fat pinched all before a glorious 3 hours in sunny, clear "warm" water. Last year this swim was my undoing, but this year it was a delight.
Have a look at that! Greg and Ben are still hanging out in their speeods and Michael up the back is in a singlet. (please take no notice of the other shivering swimmers)
We warmed up, ate, tried to rest and then had to get cold again 2 hours later for our second swim of the day (1.5hrs) only this one is on no feeds.
I was spent, and all of a sudden it's not fun anymore, actually it's kinda shit. I'm tired, and tired of being cold.
Thats four swims down, but they will all be dwarfed by tomorrow's marathon challenge.
This is not a good time to lack motivation especially considering the dire conditions predicted...Thanks Melbourne.
4:45am and the house is a buzz of activity
I forgot to mention we all took a magic micro-chipped pill at midnight so we could have live readings of our core temperature coming from somewhere in the depths of our gut. At 5:45am standing in the howling wind my tympanic temp was 35C but my core was 41C.
"Wow" you might say, and you wouldn't be wrong- it was like Alice Springs in there and despite "feeling cold", my core temp didn't deviate very far from 41C the whole 8 hours in 14C water. A very useful adaptation for the kind of swims I intent to take on.
Its not easy to describe the feeling of standing in our cossies; freezing cold, howling wind and pitch dark knowing that jumping in means committing to 8 hours. Especially considering that outside the relative protection of Brighton Baths the ocean is (for want of a better word) turbulent...
Actually it is easy..."a sense of impending doom" would pretty accurately sum up what I was feeling when this photo was taken.
I've mentioned the weather and allow me to reiterate -it was torrential. The Highway to Hell and Hell's Gate were in fine form. At Hell's Gate the swell and chop were coming from every direction and just as I got a full stroke in, between mouthfuls of dirty water, I was hit by a wave rebounding off the rock wall.
The sun came for about half an hour, just long enough to give us some hope for an improvement in the weather. Alas is was just a tease, an attempt to remind us what we were missing out on.
And then the conditions got worse.
Getting in and out of Brighton Baths was becoming dangerous, we risked slicing our delicate water-logged skin squeezing through the barnacle covered railings in-between sets of waves. Swimmers were dropping like flies, being pulled out left right and centre with hypothermia.
Coaches made the decision to change locations to the calmer waters of the marina, and by "calmer" I also mean colder. It was a good choice, I couldn't pass through Hell's Gate any more- It was sole destroying.
I often get asked what I think about during long swims and how I keep myself entertained (we are not allowed to use any artificial entertainment such as a waterproof MP3) My go-to options include singing the soundtrack to Les Miserables, and reciting the entire script of "Stand By Me."
This particular swim was unique, I couldn't quite get into the rhythm of my usual entertainers, instead the only thing that came to mind was profanity and so I went with it. I went A-Z through the alphabet turning each letter into a swear word, directing my fury toward Melbourne and the conditions. What the eff am I doing here?
I also made up a song that my 4 year old niece Ada would have found hilarious, it went something like this: "Poo Bum Wee Wee, Bum Wee Poo, Bum Bum Bum Poo Poo Poo. Poo Bum Wee Face Bum Wee Poo, Wee Wee Poo Bum Face"
Stuart having his temperature taken.
This photo was taken at about 7hr 45min, destroyed, but alive, we all have a new benchmark. It was the hardest swim I've done, but I've done it. No matter what I am faced with in the future this Melbourne swim will always be harder.
I hope to hell the English Channel does not throw these kind of conditions at me, and if it does I will now for it. I will swim proud, with my shoulders back, look it squarely in the face and proclaim NOTHING GREAT IS EASY!!!
A huge Thank You to Tara, Vanessa and Diane. Nicki, Sab, Ali, Texan and the Pirate. Super coaches and mentors Vlad and Charm.
